It didn’t even cross my mind to write a post about this until I saw this photo in my gallery on my phone.
I wasn’t even shocked or dissatisfied with what I saw. I do look at the photo and think that if that’s what I’m going to look like, I’m ok with it.
I really don’t know what happened when I turned 30. I don’t know whether I lost part of my conscious that cares what people think of me, I realised someone or whether I just was filled with acceptance or what shell I have.
Being comfortable is not how I would describe myself. Accepting is more accurate. I accept that I am who I am. I accept that I will never find a weight-loss remedy that will make me look like Demi Lovato overnight, these things take commitment, motivation and a hell of a lot of effort. I currently have none of those. I’m just lazy.
Something I still can’t get to grips with is the old cleanse tone and moisturise malarkey. Us women are kind of brainwashed by all these companies that we should be doing this to keep our skin fresh and youthful. Excuse me! I might not look 18 anymore but I don’t think I’m quite looking 31 and I only use moisturiser if I’ve got dry skin and I will admit that I only use cleansing products when I’m trying to wipe away last nights makeup the morning after. I know…. I’m disgusting. That’s like one of the worst things you can do. But… I don’t cake makeup on. I don’t use a trowel for application. To be honest some days I only put mascara on and pencil my eyebrows.
I am a true believer in “if it’s not broke, don’t fix it” for two reasons, laziness (as stated above) and that why cover yourself up. Why hide? I know for some people it is a confidence boost. They feel like they will be judged if they don’t have lots of makeup on. There is a lot of judgement to look a certain way. I’m not going to start ranting about how the media is to blame. We all know it has it’s responsibility but peer pressure has a massive blame too. I know for a fact that if I’d grown up in a family or group of friends that were heavily into the whole beauty regime, I would have most definitely taken up the habit. I’m one of the most impressionable people you would ever meet.
Ok so I don’t know why I or any of us do this but we do. In the strive for beauty perfection we put ourselves through hell. (Well it’s not as bad walking on hot coals but it’s definitely a first world problem many of us endure) I’m talking about hair curling. I’m going to call it the Modern Day Torture. I describe it like having a tattoo; you endure stupid amounts of pain for an end result and then you completely forget about the pain until the next time.
My search for the perfect curling tool
I have naturally pretty straight thick hair. As I’ve got older I’ve played around with loads of different tools for hair curling. From tongs, to wands, from the Aurora Band to Velcro rollers, I’ve tried pretty much all there is to. I have drawers and cupboards full but I’m yet to be 100% satisfied with anything I’ve found.
I’m like most people though, I want what I don’t have. I’ve been striving for curly hair for years but never seem to be able to get them just as I want them.
What did I use?
This time I decided to dig out my old Velcro rollers. My mum bought them for me as a Christmas present a couple of years ago. They came in a lovely cute silk drawstring bag. A set of 12 in total I believe in three different sizes.
I have used this set before but I couldn’t really remember how they turned out. “What have I got to loose by trying them out again?”
What happened?
I sectioned my hair. Biggest rollers on the top of my head and the smaller ones round the side. Simple enough. I secured them into place with grips. Gave them a spritz of hair spray and we were off.
I did worry how they were going to stay in my hair though. So a stroke of genius came over my and I decided to put a bandanna on. I was pretty please with the way I looked with that on, never mind the end result. I was worrying whether I was going to be able to sleep in them but I thought it was worth giving them a shot.
I laid in bed on my back and things seemed ok. I made sure that there were no grips jabbing me in the head and especially the ears. I couldn’t cope with much more aggravation of my industrial piercing. Seemed ok. Laid and watched tv for a bit. Not too bad and then slowly the ache started. The pressure of the way the rollers were positioned was pulling on the back of my head. Grips were poking a bit too. That’s ok I’ll just roll over… Oh no you won’t. That was even worse. I tried my pillow in all sorts of positions. Nope. Nothing. Ok so we were in for the long haul. I had a feeling I wasn’t going to get much sleep. In the end I must have but I woke up about every hour tossing and turning not able to find a comfortable position. “Should I take them out? Should I give up?” I thought. Nope, I’m not a quitter. I will endure unnecessary pain for an unknown gain.
I’ve started to realize that the process of curling your hair is like baking a cake, you put a hell of a lot of effort in to creating what you hope will be a delightful product but there is no certainty or guarantee what you will get. Will it be a complete disaster? Will it be amazing? You don’t know until right at the end.
What were the results?
After what seemed like the worst night sleep, I got up, did my usual morning routine and it was the moment I’d been waiting for.
Ta da!
Well I was expecting more curls but I always do.
Overall I was pretty happy though. I’d decided to put the rollers in because I wanted more volume, not because I wanted a curly mop.
The review
The results: 6/10 – The curls didn’t last very long. It did look like a good blow-dry.
The process: 2/10 – The only reason I’m not giving it 1/10 because I know I’ve used some other method before that was more painful but for the life of me I can’t remember until I subject myself to it next time.
Anyway. I will continue to test out these processes. Hopefully finding the easiest and most pain free solution.
So I’m very excited. My newest lipstick arrived yesterday and today I get to try it out.
Before I start I will add that it no way am I being paid to promote this product.
Say hello to Unicorn!
For those that know me know that tend to favour Barry M make over others due to them being against animal testing and the fact that there products aren’t too expensive. For this make-up novice over here I find them perfect.
My most favourite lipstick up until has been the Genie one. For those who don’t know it’s in a pink and green, the stick is green but when it goes on your skin it turns a voluptuous dark pink on me. And I state reinforce the “ME” part of that statement. I believe the whole idea of the Genie and now the Unicorn is that it doesn’t go the same colour on everyone. Apparently it reacts with the oils in your skin and goes a bespoke colour to you.
How did I find it?
Well I do nearly all of my shopping online and I love Amazon. I was just looking through the new beauty and make-up products and there it was.
TA DAH!!
I HAD to have it.
So…
I’ve got to work this morning, exciting knowing that I’d got it in my bag. I’ve sat at my desk, got it out and put it on. Not before taking the obligatory before and after photos.
As you can see from the photo it’s not a “boom in your face” colour but it’s quite subtle. It’s quite a “juicy” colour if you can describe a lipstick shade that way. I’m quite happy with it. Usually I wear Lush Lip Tint at work as I find I don’t need to reapply it loads and when it fades it doesn’t fade from the centre out and requires hourly top-ups.
It feels nice and moisturised and doesn’t feel like it needs extra.
Overall I’d give it a 7 out of 10. Mainly because the Genie would get a 9 or 10 because I love the colour so much but this one is nice for work.
I recently stayed in a hotel in central Barcelona – a modern chic hotel. It even had a rooftop bar and pool (not that I managed to take advantage of the pool due to the weather not being so good). So what is this post about I hear you thinking? A hotel bathroom, that’s what.
Lies, Lies, Lies?
So from my own experience, hotel bathroom mirrors lie…. I’ve never looked so tanned in my life as I do in a hotel bathroom. I’ve questioned this before and been advised that it’s most likely the lighting that affects how tanned we look. I’m pasty pale 90% of the year apart from the odd occasion I get in the sun for more than a couple of minutes and manages to turn a great shade of lobster.
In the lovely hotel I decided to go for a shower on my first night there. Despite arriving at the hotel around 8ish, and being starving, I wanted to freshen up. So I tied my hair up into one of those sexy rough top knots and walked into the modern dark tiled bathroom equipped with a full wall of mirror over the sink, toilet, bidet and huge walk in shower. “We’ve got a bloody party shower!!” I exclaimed in excitement. This didn’t last long I can assure you…
I got all of my restricted toiletries out ready for the ol’ clean down and proceeded to get into the shower. I did the usual 2 minutes of fathoming out how this fancy shower could possibly work. Well it had buttons…I’ve not experienced buttons on a normal shower, only an electric shower. This is where my confusion started. Then I noticed it was clearly asking me which shower I would like to turn on…. there was more that one?…. oh yeah… one large circular shower head over me mounted to the roof of the shower and a hand held one, pointed directly at my face. What could go wrong here? Nothing! I actually understand said shower buttons and managed to turn the right shower on at a normal temperature. Phew! crisis averted….
So, I let the showery fun begin. Got my lovely Lush Rockstar soap and started to lather up. I was having a good rub, head tilted back, eyes closed and then it happened….. I opened my eyes, just one of those quick glances (I’m not sure why we all do these glances. Maybe a natural instinct. Maybe it’s something instilled in us as we’re most vulnerable when we have our eyes closed. I dunno) and I caught my reflection in the mirror. GAH!!!!
The Hotel Bathroom Mirror
What was I looking at??!!?? It looked like me, facial expression was definitely resembling resting bitch face, which is what I’m known for. Everything seemed to be in the right place. I’d not suddenly lost an arm or grown a boob on my head in the few minutes I’d been in the bathroom. Maybe I’d gone over my limit of brain use in such a small time with the whole figuring out of the shower but I really couldn’t understand what was wrong…
Knowing that we were wanting to go out to explore the immediate vicinity of the hotel, I hurried up, despite the confusion. I did however keep my eyes closed to prevent anymore confusion and to also let my brain process what it had just seen. Rub, rub, rub, splash, splash, splash. I’m sure you know what happens in a shower…
I grabbed the towel that I’d placed over the towel rail, turned the shower off and wrapped it around myself in a typical style. Brain was now attempting to process…
The possibilities were:
Yes you’re really that bloody fat and ugly
The heat in the bathroom is playing with your eyes
There is something wrong with the mirror
I was just staring at myself. Long stares… Pulling and prodding at myself.
Now point 1 seemed the most logical. And before I get judged for being all “woe is me” and attempting to fish for compliments, that’s far from it. I’m quite accepting of the way I look and don’t need validation from others. Obviously I’d love to have the body of Demi Lovato but I got dealt the body I have and all the burgers, pizza, Chinese food and beer have helped me create the body I have today. I could accept that point 1 was the truth but it seemed odd that this wasn’t what I’d seen in my own mirror at home in both the bathroom and bedroom.
Considering point 2 I thought was unlikely. I’ve never heard of heat or steam affecting someone in the way that people start to see their own reflections like a scene from Shallow Hal.
And on to point 3. I stood in front of the mirror staring back at myself. I looked ok now. Normal to what I’m used to and would expect. That’s when it dawned on me… the bloody mirror had a join in it. So basically the wall along where the sink was had a mirror from the back of the sink up to the ceiling. But the wall to the left also had a mirror. What I’d seen when I was in the shower was my own reflection curving around the bathroom wall with a join in the middle. To describe what I saw was me but like 3 times as wide with a weird shaped chest and stomach.
Oh thank goodness!! It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was. I still wasn’t the oil painting I would prefer to be but I wasn’t the monster I’d seen 5 minutes prior.
Yay!! I’m not a munter!! Oh wait. Then I was welcomed by “mr stupidly small shaving mirror that can only move backwards and forwards and is no real use for tall or short people” apart from showing EVERY. SINGLE. Spot, black head, stray hair, you name it… I now had the shock realization that my beauty mirror at home is exactly that, a mirror that makes me feel beautiful. Now I’m not saying it’s like the mirror from Snow White but it must be softer or something. Anyway, now I was stuck in a foreign country with no tweezers and none of my usual beauty products. (I’d decided to go au-natural and not bring any liquids, creams, hair products etc and I even left many straighteners at home) ??
What to do next
So now my only option was to try and resolve the situation, avoid the mirror like it was some guy I’d once snogged when beer goggles were definitely in effect, or go out and buy some supplies. I’m not the most beauty focused and knowledgeable person out there when it comes to things like that. I wear what make-up I want to, I clean it off when I want to and I know what works and what doesn’t with my skin. I really couldn’t be arsed giving way to the pressures of “the mirror” and going out to buy things. Right, that was it. Those few stray hairs around my eyebrows weren’t suddenly going to make Stephen repulsed. He’s usually got his eyes on his phone anyway, I hardly think he’ll have noticed.
I could deal with it. Bye bye mr mirror, back you go. I pushed it away with such sass and put him back in his place. (Not sure why I’m calling it and him but it right at the time)
And I managed it. I went 4 days, 3 nights without using tweezers, razor, moisturizer, cleanser etc. etc. etc. and guess what?! I look pretty much the same. So lesson learned. I probably don’t need to be that concerned about things yet. Actually I think I’m pretty lucky to not ‘need’ loads of products.
At the end of the day
This is just after the incident. See, I’m smiling because I’m not letting those stray eyebrows weigh me down
So in reflection (excuse the really awfully timed pun), bathroom mirrors are arseholes! They are. Especially hotel ones but the truth is that we shouldn’t need to feel that we have to be the epitome of perfection on a daily basis. You’re allowed a day off. It’s fine. Let your skin have a break. Give yourself a break. Spend those 5 minutes you might spend shaving on a daily, weekly or however frequently you do basis, use that 5 minutes to kick back and relax. Lay back in the bath and appreciate your beauty for what it is.
This is probably one of my longest posts and I really could have summed this up in like a paragraph at the beginning but I felt that it was an important subject that we shouldn’t just brush over.
Oh and just a note. I’ll be uploading a diary from my Barcelona trip once I get round to it.
The weekend before last I witnessed what I can only be described as an unnecessary and useless hairstyle.
What happened?
I went out into Barnsley with the significant other. We went to a place called the Grill Pit and indulged in way to much grilled and BBQ food washed down with a number of cocktails and numerous beers.
Afterwards we decided to head upstairs to Jock’s Cavern, which is a cool rock/indie bar where they often have live music.
We settled into the atmosphere and engaged in the drinking and unorganized swaying to covers of popular rock songs.
I love to people watch and spend most of my time squinting (as I barely go “out” with my glasses on). I spotted the regulars: roadies, young overly dressed 18 year olds way too over dressed for the venue, groups of guys on the pull, drunk 50 plus women and a birthday group.
It was all going well until a group of, what I can imagine, were early twenties, fashionable girls. There were four of them. One had long hair, just down. One had a top knot. One had her hair down with some of it clipped up off her face. And the other……… well!
Imagine a top knot but at the back of your head. Only taking the hair of a 4 inch square lower than the crown.
Something like this
In my head I asked the following questions:
Did she forget to take it out?
Was it that ridiculous that she thought she was setting some kind of trend?
Because it was at the back of her head did she not notice it was there?
Did someone play a joke on her?
Did it have a purpose that wasn’t obvious, like creating a surgery free face lift?The questions kept coming with no logical answer.
I decided I couldn’t be witnessing this so I decided I needed photographic evidence to write a post on here. Emily after a couple of pints/cocktails didn’t have her best judgement at hand…cue reaching for her phone and turning around to take a quick snap on her phone…
Wait…
No
No!
NOOOOOO!!!!
THE FLASH WAS ON!!!
ABORT, ABORT, ABORT MISSION!!
I panicked and as quick as I could swung my arm and made it (what I thought) look like I was taking a picture of the bar.
Phew catastrophe avoided! I think…
What’s this girl’s problem?
A lot of people who know me know that I may have struggled for some time to accept that the “top knot” is a thing. I struggled to come to terms with the fact that there was a tending hair style for men. Seemed strange at first. Then came women with top knots. Again it seems odd but I accepted it. I have no idea what this hair style would have even been called: The Back Knot? The No Point at all Knot Who knows?!
In conclusion
I learnt the following things:
Drunk Emily cannot and does not remember to turn her flash of when taking photos of unsuspecting targets
I will definitely THINK and CHECK before I ever attempt to do this again
I have real issues with hairstyles that aren’t practical or look good
I can deal with different variations of “top knot” but not a bloody “back knot”
This is a question that came up in a conversation with a friend of mine last weekend. The conversation started about make-up and products and inevitably ended up on that subject a lot of women take very seriously.
Now, go back 5 years… I don’t remember ever thinking “holy crap, I looked washed out today, oh yeah it’s because I forgot to put my eyebrows on”. Now this is a thing. It’s actually a thing! I refuse to leave the house without my eyebrows done or mascara. Why? It’s not like someone is going to walk up to me and go “what the hell have you done? You can’t come out today without fully coloured in brows!”
Believe me, I’m not the only one that feels this way.
I’m not a beautician or will ever profess to be one but I can completely see the difference. Having my eyebrows coloured in makes my eyes look “better”. I don’t know how else to describe it.
I’ve just spent 10 minutes trying to find a picture of myself pre-eyebrows and i can’t. Must have been the whole “selfie” generation came in just around that time. Coincidence? I think not!!
The first time…
I first had my eyebrows done for a mother and daughter photoshoot. As you can see I didn’t end up with “slugs” or a scouse brow. Far from it. It looks pretty natural. Before you start to judge me by thinking “that photo is totally photoshopped”, and you would be right. I’ve never looked that flawless in real life. EVER!
I struggle to be advernturous with make-up in general as I never know what to wear or how to apply. Add that with the fact I have got two different coloured eyes and then it blows my mind.
What do I use?
I prefer using products that are animal cruelty free. This is something I’ve decided to follow in the last year or so as I’ve started relying on make-up more and more. I prefer Barry M. Not because I have particular standards or anything but it works for me.
Keeping the standard up…
So this is what I keep my eyebrows like now and hope to do for a while until some other trend comes along.
I can assure you now though, I will never shave them off. Did that once before… that story is for another day!
I first had my eyebrows done for a mother and daughter photoshoot. As you can see I didn’t end up with “slugs” or a scouse brow. Far from it. It looks pretty natural. Before you start to judge me by thinking “that photo is totally photoshopped”, and you would be right. I’ve never looked that flawless in real life. EVER!
So this is what I keep my eyebrows like now and hope to do for a while until some other trend comes along.